Hayley Stewart: Ask Me Anything
Hayley is an award winning plus size blogger, covering topics such as fashion and mental health.
Please tell us about the coping mechanisms that you use when anxiety hits.
I try to ascertain where the anxiety is coming from, why I might be feeling that way and perhaps have a rational thought with myself about what it is, otherwise I try to redirect myself with other activities.
Sometimes I don’t want to get out of bed in the morning, how can I motivate myself?
I think when I’m struggling with poor mental health I often think that any energy I have should be used on tasks and chores that I don’t really wanna do. So I think planning something into you day that you actually wanna get done and you’d actually enjoy doing can be a really helpful motivator to get you out of bed.
Hayley Stewart
Name: Hayley Stewart
About: Hayley is an award winning plus size blogger, covering topics such as fashion and mental health.
Who inspires you?
I think just anyone who’s being open and talking honestly about things that we don’t talk about enough. I think there are loads of things that have become taboo subjects and we can’t even really remember why. So strong women who are talking about things, that’s amazing to me.
I always like to say that being body positive, or learning to love yourself isn’t like a degree, it’s not like a piece of paper and you get it and that’s it, you’re done, it’s a journey.Hayley Stewart
Sometimes I feel so socially anxious that I isolate myself. What can I do?
I really relate to this one a lot and I think for me it’s trying to figure out what situations are really triggering for me and then I try to spend time one on one with people or in smaller groups because that’s OK too and the people who you’re close to will understand.
Any tips to combat overthinking and a busy mind? Meditation doesn’t work for me.
All sorts of things can be meditations, so you don’t have to be there in like an ‘om’ pose to be meditating. So you could be doing the dishes, or vacuuming, or colouring in. All of those things can be a meditation as long as you’re mindful.
What’s the best way to educate people about body shaming?
It’s not always the easiest thing, but I think being honest about your experiences and telling people what that’s like. I think talking about it’s really important. A lot of people who haven’t outright experienced it won’t understand, so if you can give them a human face to it I think they’ll understand it a little more.
When you have a moment of negativity towards yourself how do you turn it around?
I always like to say that being body positive, or learning to love yourself isn’t like a degree, it’s not like a piece of paper and you get it and that’s it, you’re done, it’s a journey. Sometimes there’ll be hard times and I just try to remember when I was feeling a bit better about myself and know that it will pass.
Any advice on keeping a household together when you’re struggling with mental health?
Firstly, give yourself a break. If you’re getting up, if you’re going to work, if you’ve got all this other stuff going on, it’s ok if something slips a little. And secondly, if you’re struggling or it’s bugging you, it’s ok to ask for help too. Ask a good friend or a family member to come over and give you some help.
What was the turning point on your self-acceptance journey?
I turned 30 and I just thought, what the hell are you doing? You’ve absolutely wasted so many years just feeling unhappy in the body that you’re in and I didn’t want to spend the next 30 years like that, so it became a project that I was working on.
What’s the hardest part about speaking openly about anxiety and mental health issues?
It’s definitely hard to be vulnerable, especially in a world that doesn’t know that much about mental health and what that looks like. So I think sometimes I find that hard, some people might not believe it or understand it, but I have to keep talking about it if I hope that they might one day get it.
