Main content
#TheArchers Listeners' Guide to: Euphemisms and Code Words
1. "I've brought you flowers"
Definition: "I'm about to lose my virginity with your granddaughter. Thanks for letting me come round." [See also: 'Getting the pizzas in']
Wonder if he even spent any money on gift wrapping? [Pauline Hooley on ]
Nice red ribbon? [Louise Consterdine on ]
2. Getting the pizzas in
[See also: 'I've brought you flowers']
3. "Mortifornication"
Definition: Certain fate awaiting anyone foolhardy enough to embark on a sexual tryst without first consulting the woman who calls herself their mother.
4. Debbie!
Definition: An exclamation or cry of great joy. Used in multiples and/or capitals to express ever greater quantities of pleasure.
5. "His mother has a broken leg and his sister has addiction problems."
Definition: "In the eyes of all Archers listeners I am almost certainly implicated in the violent death of this man."
6. Cultured stroke play
Find yourself drawn to someone who is already in a relationship? Tried taking them out to lunch several times and already offered them a go on your drone? Why not compliment their 'cultured stroke play'?
7. "Some heifers have got into the orchard!鈥�
Of particular use when a friend/family member calls at 7.02pm on a weekday or between the hours of 10.02 - 11.15 on a Sunday morning: Yell this, as David did when Jennifer called to discuss the Flood Plan, then drop the phone and return to your business.
8. "Listening to The Archers"
What is it that everyone is REALLY getting up to between 7.02pm and 7.15pm. No really. Is it what we think it is? Mind is racing here...
Join us!
- On
- Have your say on , Follow and
Or join the discussions on Archers fan forums:
- Mustardland:
- Mustardland:
