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Parodies |
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You Are Old, Father William
by RosieT
 This parody of Lewis Carroll's famous poem - which was itself a parody of The Old Man's Comforts by Robert Southey - just had to be written. Find more clever parodies and flights of fancy in the Fantasy Archers topic of .
"You are old, father William," the young Georgie said,
"And your hair has become very white;
And yet you incessantly say I'm your son -
Do you think, at your age, it is right?"
"In my youth," father William replied to young George,
"I feared it might injure the brain;
But, now that I'm perfectly sure I have none,
Why, I do it again and again."
"You are old," said the youth, "as I mentioned before,
And you have grown most uncommonly fat;
Yet you go to the gym with Sid Perks every week -
Pray what is the reason for that?"
"In my youth," said the keeper, and shook his grey locks,
"I kept all my muscles quite supple
By the use of this sausage - one euro a box -
Allow me to sell you a couple?"
"You are old," said young George, "and your jaws are too weak
For anything tougher than suet;
Yet you finished the pheasant, with the bones and the beak -
Pray, how did you manage to do it?"
"In my youth," said his father, "I took to the law,
And argued each case with my brother;
And the muscular strength, which it gave to my jaw,
Makes me want to chew into another."
"You are old," said the youth, "one would hardly suppose
That your eye was as steady as ever;
Yet you shot all those targets right in the Bullseye -
What made you so awfully clever?"
"I have answered three questions, and that is enough,"
Said his dad. "Do you think I'm a hoot?!
Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?
I've squirrels to poke and to shoot!"
More parodies - from Agatha Christie to Damon Runyon
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