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I Watched Thee
By Nelson G
 Nelson G borrows from Byron's poem in this paean to Brenda, from the Fantasy Archers topic of .
I watched thee after Betty's eulogy
Wine was drunk and thou didst begin to cry
I lay thee down and bade thee cling to me
This arm would be thy arc and breast thy sty
I watched thee when Jazzer had left our side
Ready to flip those burgers - thee and me
Round plump floury baps - ready to divide
A good quality filling - that's the key
The Chalkman came and shocked my quivering gilt
His motives strange but certainly malign
Whom did I seek, fearing that blood might be spilt
For thee. Whose safety first provide for? Thine
I watched thee when Harry was on the run
At last he was found with Barbarella
And one thought struck me amidst all the fun
If you'll be my sow, I'll be your fella
And when Vicky's jellies wobbled up the aisle
(Her and the formerly dour Mike, who'd have thought)
To thee, though the sight made me smile,
My spirit turned. Crying in the loo, distraught
Thus much and more, and yet thou lov'st me not,
And though you have the longest lashes
I must switch over (you'll not be forgot)
And watch the highlights of the Ashes.
More parodies - from Agatha Christie to Damon Runyon
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