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Sally heaved herself up in bed in answer to loud knocking. A handsome care-worker breezed in. Plopping himself on the wheelchair, he swung round in circles bemoaning the fact that some people had it made, lying in wait to be whisked off to pleasures of the flesh, whilst he had to risk life and limb on his ancient, rusty bike, through the madness that was twenty first century Dublin gridlock. Lucky the lady, who captures his heart, thought Sally as he gallantly helped her off the bed into the chair, and raced, wheels spinning towards the Jacuzzi, keeping up a stream of banter like a chat show host.

Luxuriating in the warm bubbling water, free for the moment of pains of the body, Sally knew that this was a watershed time. Tomorrow she must face reality again and a new life on the north of the border, back to family and old friends. These past few weeks had helped her to sort out many things and plan new horizons. She had learned meditation, started to paint again, and had even written a poem! But most of all, she had learned to ask for help. From a large family, she had learned self-reliance from an early age and prided herself on her independence. This trait sometimes caused a bit of friction between her and Joe.

Joe and Sally had grown up together. At school Joe was always there to help her fight battles, make life easier for her. At secondary school they had gone their separate ways. It was in Dublin at college that they came together again, fell in love and got married after they had graduated.

When they discovered that little Daisy was on the way, they put their city apartment on the market and moved to the wilds of Wicklow to realise their long time ambition of buying a cottage with a few acres to start a garden centre. A lot of hard work was involved but they lovingly planned it together and in the spring of the second year, they had their grand opening. Little Daisy was a sunny rosy-faced child, thriving in the outdoor life, learning to walk and talk amidst flowerpots and watering cans. The future looked bright with the business growing at a steady pace.

In the autumn of that year Sally got the long awaited call from hospital for non-urgent surgery for an ongoing medical problem. Timing couldn’t have been better. Things at the centre were slack at this time of the year and she should be well on her feet again for the springtime planting. Joe always shone in times of need so she had no worries about him or Daisy.

It was a few weeks after the operation that it became clear that all was not as it should have been. Sally felt so ill. She was in constant pain, could barely walk, talk or even think clearly. At the six week check up the consultant was very concerned. He thought that the surgery had been successful but there was obviously something else wrong with her. He referred her to a neurologist. Another long wait ensued. They put on brave faces to each other saying that it was bound to be something simple. Sure she’d never had a day off sick before and lead a fairly healthy life style. After many weeks in hospital for all sorts of tests they had a diagnosis of M.E. but nothing in the way of treatment. It was something that she was going to have to live with.

Back at home again things were different. Daisy had changed - from sunny and outgoing to a moody clingy child. Sally was too ill to have patience with her and Joe was run ragged trying to look after them both and getting little or no sleep, what with trying to do all and keep Sally’s spirits up which was an uphill battle. The answer to their problems seemed to jump out at him from the newspaper. An au- pair. He made the call straight away and before the week was out Roma, an energetic Italian, with a good command of English had arrived and was a big hit with Daisy. She soon had a routine established and the house shipshape. She was great company for Sally who had found the isolation almost unbearable. Life now had regained a semblance of normality and Daisy quickly bounced back to her usual self. Joe was very busy with the sowing and planting, happy now that Daisy was being well looked after. The greenhouses had lost their sparkle for him and he was now working alone so it took more than twice as long.

Sally was beginning to get used to her new sedentary life. She spent long hours alone and missed Joe’s company. She worried about the business. There was far too much work for one person and they couldn’t afford to take on any paid help, what with the medical bills on top of everything. She kept these things to herself as Joe had enough to worry about. There was a new playgroup opening in the village and Daisy would benefit from the company of other children. Roma was more than willing to exchange her role of minding Daisy to working a few hours in the greenhouses. For every problem there was a solution. As long as she had Joe, she would be ready for whatever life threw at them. Sometimes Joe wheeled her down to the greenhouses for an hour or so. Sally loved these times but tired very quickly and soon had to be taken back to the house. This really upset both of them and stopped the flow of work. Joe was working night and day to ensure all was ready for the Easter-time rush.

The house was uncannily silent with Daisy gone all morning. Sally sat by the window, tears streaming down her face. Joe and Daisy seemed to be getting on with life and she was stuck in this gaping void of sickness. She could hear peals of laughter and the babble of talk from the green house as Roma and Joe, heads close together, got on with the potting- up. She felt the burden of her illness prising herself and Joe apart. Even getting dressed left her absolutely drained, so she stayed in bed and lost interest in everything. She moaned at Joe constantly for not spending enough time with her and when he did, she remained sulky and withdrawn. They would all be better off without her dragging them down.

Joe was glad to escape to work at the sight of Sally’s tearstained face. Roma was a tonic. Always bubbling with enthusiasm for whatever task he set for her and she was a natural with Daisy. She reminded him of the old Sally. He knew that they could not manage without her. They were growing closer and this worried him. Sally had changed almost beyond recognition. She was very depressed and had lost all faith in the medical establishment.

Joe was doing his level best. That particular morning, she lay staring vacantly at the ceiling, ignoring both him and her breakfast. Banging the door behind him, he stormed downstairs. After he had calmed down, he began to feel uneasy about Sally. Never before had she behaved like this. Taking the stairs two at a time he burst into their bedroom. She lay so still, a death-like pallor on her face, an empty bottle of painkillers on the bed beside her.

After a spell in hospital, a lot of counselling and some medication, Sally felt that she had been given the tools with which to face the reality of her illness. Now finding it difficult to believe that she had allowed herself to get so low, they were busy making plans again. The garden centre was put on the market. It was too much to cope with and they had decided to move back home where there was a large family network to help them through difficult times and of course, there was the National Health Service to lift the burden of medical expenses. Joe had taken Daisy to stay with her grandparents while he found a new home for them. He would be joining the burgeoning family business of organic farming.

Sally’s stay at this beautiful respite care centre was almost over. It was a wonderful oasis wherein she had rediscovered some of her old zest for life. She would start painting again. With a bit of luck she might even be able to sell some of her work, and maybe even try her hand at writing. She now knew that she couldn’t do it on her own but that Joe and Daisy and her siblings would be right behind her all the way. It would be good to get back home, to hunker down, to heal.