I've just realised how much over the last 25 years I've used my children as an excuse for all kinds of antisocial behaviour.
Any social invitation you're not sure about, any party you want to leave early .... you use the Child Excuse. "Oh, we'd love to, but our regular babysitter's run off with an Australian windsurfer, so we're a bit stuck at the moment. "No, it's been a super party, and we're sorry to be leaving just as the folk dancing's starting, but Jack's asthma ... we'd better get back..."
Trouble is, that kind of excuse tends to ring a bit false when your children are 24, 21 and 18. "Sorry, got to get back for Jack" isn't going to convince a host who knows that the Jack in question is taller - and probably infinitely more capable of looking after himself - than his father is.
Of course, this need for new excuses is part of something bigger. It's the old Empty Next Syndrome. I remember feeling desolated when my youngest started going to school all day. Because after lunch was when we had our walk, and I was left having to go for a walk on my own.
But this does mean that I've got to find some new excuses. Well we do have 5 cats. Do you think we could get away with "Sorry, got to get back ... you know ... the cats ..."
