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Ten years ago Kerry Lee's wife, Jenny, died from breast cancer. For the last 2 Β½ years of her life Kerry nursed her at home. But despite Jenny's illness and impending death the family never really spoke about it.

Kerry and Jenny

Kerry never knew that Jenny had had tests for breast cancer. She had been ill for some time, but had neglected her health. When Kerry eventually found out, it transpired that the she had had cancer for so long that it had got into her bones.

Once she'd been diagnosed, Jenny never discussed the illness or its outcome with either Kerry or their sons sons, Philip 21 and Matthew 19.

The subject of death was never mentioned. As far as Kerry was concerned it would never happen. He says, "There was going to be a miracle cure just like in the films and TV".

But after Jenny's death, Kerry was relieved to discover that she had talked to other people about death. She had told a friend that she wasn't afraid to die. Kerry believes that Jenny didn't speak to him about it because she was concerned not to upset him further.

Since Jenny's death, Kerry has become something of an authority on coping with death. One lady in particular was very concerned and came to see Kerry at home. Kerry bumped into the woman at his local doctor's surgery. He says, "She gave me a big hug and a big kiss and if that wasn't embarrassing enough, she announced to the people in the waiting room that this man had saved her life". On talking to Kerry, she had decided that she needed to see a doctor and got their in time.

Kerry is sorry that he never got the opportunity to talk to Jenny about dying. "If I was to be in the same situation again then I would have no hesitation in talking about it".