20 Feb 1779: Thunder.
Abr Foulmire d of the Pustular Flux. Two Cardinals poison'd in Bologna.
Thos Warthog struck by lightning and d. Rec'd of Jabez Archer for pigs
0£, 1s, 11 3/4d, the Snells havg left his sty and return'd to their hovel,
to his great relief. However, havg already sold the pigs I had of him,
was obliged to obtain some as replacements
ITEM: to Dan'l Rathole, for
pigs, 0£, 0s, 7 1/2d).
Annual football game vs Lower
Toadpool this day. Ambridge won by two broken legs and an arm, the arm
affordg me much mirth. Gain'd 3 sovs from wager with Sir Oliver Foxbrush,
wch pleas'd me so, that I neglected to kick an elderly Quaker. Chirugeon
Hathaway regards me with less civility than is due from one gentln to
another, and I wonder if my secret is discover'd. Dined upon lung, calf's
brain and rook pie, with six botts claret. Concluded evening with many
merry jests at wch my wife Jenny seemed unamused for some reason.
ITEM: to new wig, 0£, 0s, 6 3/4d.
To plaisters,0£, 0s, 1/4d.
Feb 21: Drizzle. Isiah
Mumble d of the Stumbles. The Intelligencer reports an Italian nblmn,
Count Volta, to have discover'd a means of bottlg the Electric Fluid.
Coroner sat upon Thos Warthog and found him to have d from be'g struck
by lightning. Vicar call'd in AM petitioning alms for poor of the parish.
Resolv'd to set true example of the Christian charity an English gentln
always shows.
ITEM: to poor of the parish (exc
Jas Henbane who once voted against my man at an election, Prudence Potsherd
who is a witch and Eli the Gypsy, who is a Gypsy): 0£, 0s, 3d.
Bt cheap cow of Frdrck Mangle.
Chirugeon Hathaway, his wife writes privily to confirm that our secret
is discover'd, and we must find a strategem to avoid publick shame. Dined
but sparingly, the melancholick vapours being upon me: udders, tripe,
worats, 3 botts Madeira and 1 of Brandy.
ITEM: to Frdrck Mangle, for
cheap cow: 0£, 0s, 7 3/4d.
22 Feb: Fog. Thos Stumble
d of the Mumbles. Amos Foultooth saw the Devil in Long Acre and went M.
A Scotchman named Jas Watt said to have invented a locomotive engine power'd
by a steamkettle, tho no gentln gives credence to such fantastickal reports.
Cheap cow that I bought of Frdrck Mangle d in the AM. In PM, perceiv'd
chirugeon in distance, but he was intercepted by my man Grogg, who reduc'd
him to a stupefaction whlst I made good my scape. Resolv'd to reward Grogg's
indispensl service by award of handsome present.
ITEM: to handsome present for
my man Grogg: 0£, 0s, 1/4d.
Deem'd it prudent to retire from
the parish awhile, so dined and stay'd overnight in Marshy Filthmire at
an ale-house.
ITEM: to din'g and stayg at ale-house:
0£, 0s, 3 1/4d. To ale: 0£, 5s, 0d.
Read part three of Squire Aldridge's
Journal
More parodies - from Agatha Christie
to Damon Runyon
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