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Sixty Going on Seventy
by Doctor_Darling
 An Ambridge resident wickedly pinned, in this Sound of Music parody from the Fantasy Archers topic of .
I once was a babe
Not so long ago
With a figure to rival Jordan's,
I once was a babe
Then one day - oh woe!
I woke up and smelled the Gordon's
(The Gor-dons..)
I am sixty going on seventy
Time! I'm not giving in!
Preserved are my gifts
With face creams and lifts
And pickled with fags and gin.
I am sixty going on seventy
And I've still got the goods!
All Tiger asks
Is me in the basques
I purchase at Underwoods.
Totally unprepared am I
For skirts below the knee.
Brazen and bold and bared am I
And fuelled by HRT.
I'd like someone
Younger and hotter
I could tell what to do.
Ed, you're twenty going on thirty:
I'll take care of you.
(Dirty laugh. Much skipping on and off benches outside the Bull).
"Whoops! Tumbled over!"
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