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Around The Am
by Clint Driftwood

Lovers of classic radio comedy will enjoy this spot-on parody, one of a continuing series posted to .



Mr Horne: Hello and welcome to this week's show. Firstly the part I know you have all been waiting for, namely the answer to last week's quiz in which we asked you to fill in the missing word from a line of a popular song ...

We gave you; I can't help falling in *?

Well I have to say that we had a huge response to this, and quite a number of you sent in the correct answer, which is of course "love."

I would at this point like to say a heartfelt thank you to a Mr Pullen from Ambridge who although sadly answered incorrectly, did in fact provide us with some extremely useful advice on stain removal that I have passed on to Wandering Bert Fry.

Mmmmmm, I wonder whom those two people are over there dressed in pink?

Oliver: Caroline?

Caroline: Oliver?

Oliver: Is it?

Caroline: Yes, I'm afraid it is.

Oliver: I was so terribly, terribly, afraid that it might be.

Caroline: I know.

Oliver: I know you know. Caroline: I know you know I know.

Oliver: I know you know you know I know.

Caroline: It was just a feeling at first, but then I knew.

Oliver: I had a feeling that you knew.

Caroline: I had a feeling that you knew I knew.

Oliver: Did you?

Caroline: Yes.

Oliver: Should I trust my feelings?

Caroline: I don't know.

Oliver: I know you don't know.

Caroline: I know you know that I don't know.

Oliver: I know you know that I don't know that I don't know.

Caroline: Oliver?

Oliver: Caroline?

Caroline: How long has it been?

Mr Horne: Well, I think at this juncture we should leave them alone in private to try to resolve their particular problem. As my mother often said: listen in to other people's conversations and you will only hear ill of yourself.

So now it's over to our radio critic, Shamus David Android Archer, whose stance, luckily for him, is well to the rear of modern cutting-edge broadcasting.
SDAA: Hello, ha ha, thank you for being, and all the best. Last night some of you saw me on TV and quite a few said that they would like to, and for that matter so would I. For those of you who don't know me, hello and the same to you. If you happen to listen to The Archers on Radio 4 on Friday evening, nothing will, and I fear will not, until things change for the better or the worse. So there you have it, or not, in or out of a nutcase, as the case might be. And I seem to have run out of time so with that it's back to the studio.

Mr Horne: Well thank you for that Shamus. Personally I look forward to your weekly report: it gives me a chance to get a cup of tea

can be heard on Â鶹ԼÅÄ 7.

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