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Listeners' Fantasies |
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Sometheeng to hide?
by DebZ
 Boys will be boys, even if they're boy llamas, according to this contribution to the Fantasy Archers topic of .
"Result!" announced Wolfgang, entering the llama shed with a flourish, "Eet all feexed!"
"Eh?" said Constanza absently, gazing out of the window. "Eet so nice how Salieri steel amigo weeth Scruffee, deespite the deefferences…"
"Whad? You mean Salieri llama an' Scruffee dog?"
"No, well si, bud I mean more questÃon of eentelleegence…"
"I see whad you mean. Ees he quide mad? Mind you eef I haf leeve weeth Leenda all time eet probably send me round bend! Whad on earth he sayeeng?"……
"Slow down, Scruff, slow down. Here have a drink of water. What are you talking about? Kingfishers and cider? I think you'll find it's a woodpecker. Now, start at the beginning. You were taking Linda for a walk, and then you met Clarrie and Joe and then you went to the bird hide. The bird hide! Ohmigosh! Oh no! Catastrophe! Eh? No, I didn't say anything about Bill and Ben. So what did you do? You rushed in and tried to destroy the evidence. Um, you didn't think of trying to drag Lynda past. No. What have Joe's toenails got to do with this? Have you been drinking? Ah, I see, just the remains of the cider. Hmm, let me think…Hello Mama, Hello Papa."
"Hello boys. No Scruffee gedoff. I doan wan' you leeck my face! Has hee been dreenkeeng?"
"±Ê´Ç²õ²õ¾±²ú±ô²â…"
"He todallee peessed!"
"Wolfgang!"
"Weell, look ad heem. No efen bedder, smell hees breath!"
"I rather nod! Salieri, haf you been dreenkeeng?"
"Me?" Salieri was all wide-eyed innocence (and not quite answering the question).
"Thees ees nod funnee, Wolfgang. What's going on Salieri?"
"Apparently there has been a serious incident at the bird hide."
"The bird hide? But I there onlee lass night weeth Don Roberto." Constanza blanched.
"Were you eendeed?" interjected Wolfgang.
"Si, onlee teell juss beefore sefen, then he rush off to leesten to sometheeng on radio. Where you goieeng Salieri?"
"Just making a 'phone call. Hello, Jamie? It's Marty here…We have a problem…"
"There sometheeng smells verree feeshee here…"
Wolfgang eyed Scruffy and shook his head. "Kingfeesher's nest probablee. Deed you know they haf tunnels een bank and line them weeth feeshbones?"
"Moss unhygeeneec. Hold on minuto. Whad you been dreenkeeng Scruffee? Scruffee?"
"Bess led sleepeeng dog lie. Nefair mind, when he sober up, we offer heem hair of dog!"
"Thees ees nod funnee, Wolfgang. One of you boddles of whiskee meesseeng."
"Si, bud eet meex blend, not seengle malt."
"You take eet?"
"Naturellemente. When I deescover Joe on panel for fruit and produce show, I theenk he like leettle sometheeng, help heem make up hees mind…."
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