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Listeners' Fantasies |
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Devil's Brood
By Deb Z
 This supernatural story was contributed by the prolific Deb Z to the Fantasy Archers topic of The Archers message board
"Come along Josh stop dawdling."
Josh scowled darkly at his sister's back as she walked ahead pushing baby Ben in his buggy, her new school bag hung over the handles. Doubtless it was full of her homework, and there would be the usual complaints that she could not concentrate with all the noise, until finally she burst into tears and let someone help her. Josh suspected that this was a load of nonsense, that Pip was not very clever, and couldn't actually do her homework by herself. He used to get on with Pip, but ever since she had gone to "Big School" she had changed in some strange way, she no longer wanted to play with him.
"We'll be late if you don't hurry up!"
Quite frankly Josh did not care if they never arrived. He did not want to have tea with Granny Jill and his cousins. He had wanted to stay at home and look after Mummy, but Daddy had insisted, made it all sound like a big treat.
"Won't that be nice," he had said. "I expect Granddad will have made you all one of his special cakes, and you'll be able to meet your new cousin from New Zealand."
And that was another thing which Josh could well do without. He only hoped that this cousin wasn't as odd as the others.
"Pip," he called suddenly, "Mummy's not going to die is she?"
"Well of course she is! We're all going to die sometime (well almost all)" replied Pip, and then catching sight of her little brother's panic stricken face, continued in a gentler tone, "but not just yet. She's only got a rotten cough, and the doctor's given her some medicine, she'll be up and about in no time."
"She's not going to have another baby is she?" Josh remembered the last time that Mummy had been ill. That time she had been very ill and then just when things were almost back to normal she'd suddenly produced baby Ben. Josh had nothing against Ben in particular except that he was very boring.
"Oh really Josh, you are just so completely dumb! Of course she's not pregnant!"
Making a face, Josh took his special space wizard ray gun from his pocket and zapped Pip in the back with all his force.
"I know what you're doing," said Pip in a horribly grown up tone.
Josh did not see how she could know, not for certain, unless (horrible thought) she had eyes in the back of her head. Repressing a shudder, he hurried to catch her up.
"Bub ez leeb" burbled baby Ben happily, pointing vaguely at a fly.
"Oh what a clever boy!"
Josh was blowed if he could see anything particularly clever in not being able to pronounce "fly", but there you were, everybody seemed to regard Ben as some child prodigy, all his (limited) actions were greeted with cries of "Oh what a clever boy" by Mummy. Sometimes, Josh wondered if Mummy realised that she spoke to them all like dogs? It was probably something to do with working with animals all the time and anyway, he didn't mind, he was very fond of dogs and wished he could have a nice big dog like Daniel's. Come to think of it, Scruff was the best thing about Daniel. It was no fun at school to be known to be the cousin of Fat Boy Dan, the only boy who was so stupid that he had to have 999 tattooed on his scalp in case he forgot what number to ring in an emergency. Josh had pointed out that Fat Boy Slim was cool, but this was only met hoots of derisive laughter, and so now Josh ignored Daniel whenever possible and hid when he saw him coming.
Of course, the problem was all to do with the fact that Daniel had been adopted. Josh had not understood at first, but then he had overheard Betty and Susan talking about Rosemary's Baby and looking at Daniel and all had become clear. Auntie Shula was not really Daniel's Mummy, somebody called Rosemary was! Josh used to feel sorry for Auntie Shula, not having any children of her own, and having to make do with such an awful specimen, but then he had made two big discoveries: one, Auntie Shula actually liked Daniel and two, Auntie Shula was really a Valkerie!
This last revelation he owed entirely to Harry Potter. He remembered standing next to Auntie Shula in church one day and the moment they all stood up to sing the hymn he had been in a trance. It had been quite frightening - all around him people were apparently singing, but all he could hear was her, and he had stood still, unable to move or to speak. His Harry Potter book had implied that the Valkerie singing had been wonderfully beautiful, but Josh reasoned, there was no proof of this, in fact, he might well be the only person ever to have survived a Valkerie spell!
"Well, speak of the devil," thought Josh, as they arrived at Glebe Cottage - not that he had been speaking, just thinking hard - for there were Auntie Shula and Daniel getting out of their big four-wheel drive.
"Hello Pip," she called, ""and look at Ben, isn't he getting big now? We'll soon be taking him to Carter to get his shoes!"
This last remark shook Josh, until he realised that she had said "Clarkes", after all, Chris Carter made shoes for animals, didn't he? Auntie Shula had taken Ben out of the buggy, and she, Pip and Daniel headed for the front door. Josh trailed behind, surreptitiously making the sign to ward of the evil eye, you could never be too sure. And there was Granny Jill.
"Hello all of you," she cried, "how wonderful to see you, now why don't you all come inside and I'll pour you a nice cup of tea!"
"Was there an emergency?" wondered Josh, he didn't really want a cup of tea, and to be perfectly honest, Granny Jill's tea was not nice at all. He would much rather have a nice fizzy drink, like Mummy bought by the crateful from the Cash and Carry.
"Now, the twins are already here," continued Granny Jill. "Elizabeth dropped them off a few minutes ago."
"Oh," exclaimed Josh. "Is Uncle Nigel here?"
Josh liked Uncle Nigel; there was something rather comforting about him, like a big, shaggy dog - rather like a St Bernard with a barrel of brandy around its neck.
"No, dear," replied Granny Jill, "he's not coming today." Then she turned to Auntie Shula and whispered "Full moon tonight."
Since he had not meant to hear this last remark, Josh did not pursue the matter, but he couldn't help speculating on what might be Uncle Nigel's latest enthusiasm, which required a full moon. Perhaps it was bats or owls. Maybe he would ask Lily or Freddie. On the other hand maybe he wouldn't. There was something very disquieting about the twins. They rarely spoke to each other, but appeared to be capable of exchanging thoughts without speech. There they stood, hand in hand, their fine blond hair neatly brushed and their startlingly blue eyes fixed on him with a penetrating glare. They regarded him in silence for a few seconds and then Lily said, "Don't cry wolf."
Josh felt that this was a very strange thing to say, but then they were definitely very strange themselves. Sometimes he had the feeling that they understood exactly what he was thinking, like now for example. There was only one way to deal with this Josh knew from experience: he let his mind go blank and thought of a wall. Lily and Freddie lost interest in him and wandered away.
Granny Jill was urging them all to sit up at the table for their tea. Josh asked for his with lots of milk in it, hoping that would make it taste better.
"Aren't we waiting for Uncle Kenton and Meriel?" asked Pip.
"No, dear, they'll be arriving a little later," replied Granny Jill, settling herself down next to Auntie Shula.
"Have you any news of Helen?" asked Auntie Shula.
"Still in the clinic. I must say she looked quite awful the last time I saw her, so thin and pale. Doctors still don't know what's causing the problem."
As Granny Jill said this, Josh saw her give a funny little smile to Pip, and Pip smiled back and at that precise moment Josh noticed for the first time that Pip had extraordinarily large canine teeth! All of a sudden, a loud voice boomed, "Fee fie foe fum!" and Granddad arrived bearing a freshly baked cake and they all chanted together, "I'll grind his bones to make my bread!"
Although he knew that this was only a silly rhyme, Josh could not help reflecting that grinding somebody's bones to make bread was a thoroughly bad idea. Just look what had happened with mad cow disease! Anyway, it was a delicious cake.
"It will be so nice to have all the family together," Granny Jill was saying.
"How long is Meriel staying?"
"I'm not absolutely sure, but certainly until the end of the month."
"Oh wonderful," exclaimed Auntie Shula, her eyes sparkling, "that means she'll be here for Hallowe'en then?"
Granny Jill nodded, a beaming smile on her face. Good, thought Josh, that means they're planning a party, and we can all dress up and make turnip lanterns, and bob for apples and ... His train of thought was interrupted by the entrance of Uncle Kenton. The other children all adored Uncle Kenton, but Josh had reservations about him, although why he was totally unable to say. He was always playing the fool and making them laugh, but every now and then Josh felt him looking at Daddy in a very strange way, with a twisted look on his face.
"And here is Meriel," Uncle Kenton was saying. ""Say hello to your cousins, Merry!"
Josh looked at her closely. He was pleasantly surprised. She looked like a normal three year-old.
"G'day" said the little girl, in a strange accent.
At this point things became really weird. He would swear blind that he distinctly heard baby Ben say, "Please to meet you, hope you guessed my name!"
Nobody else appeared to notice and he looked for security at Granny Jill who was helping Meriel to take her coat off. And then a truly terrifying thing happened. Meriel's head turned a full 180 degrees and she looked Josh square in the face. The last thing he heard as he blacked out was the sound of a kookaburra laughing.
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