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Listeners' Fantasies |
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Allo LoLo!
by Vicky S
 This contribution to the Fantasy Archers topic of explores Elizabeth's attitude to Nigel's allotment idea.
From the desk of Elizabeth Archer
Dear Bert,
I understand that you and Nigel have briefly discussed the possibility of there being allotments in our grounds. As you are no doubt aware I have some doubts about the appropriate nature of this scheme and the impact upon the Lower Loxley Image which I have been at pains to nurture and develop so that we are currently one of the County's premiere leisure venues.
However since Nigel appears determined to proceed with this project I have taken the liberty to jot down some thoughts which I think we need to bear in mind to maintain the Lower Loxley standard.
1) Design: I believe we should be working towards a parterre effect, with delineation of the plots maintained by clipped box. Are you familiar with the gardens of Versailles? Of course our little project would not be on such a grand scale, but we should always be inspired by perfection. I'm sure you agree that conventional rectangular beds can be very dull and formulaic. Fortunately I have a dear friend who is a garden designer, you may have seen his four hour garden makeover programmes on Zeitgeist Living TV, and I am sure he would be willing to offer design input.
2) Vegetables: heritage varieties only of course. I realise that there may be slight difficulty in obtaining stock and some loss of productivity, however the extra expense should be more than compensated for by the knowledge that we are maintaining traditions commensurate with the history of Lower Loxley. Similarly I think we must insist on fully organic husbandry. I am sure we can come to a reasonable arrangement with the tenants to supply rare breed manure and Lower Loxley leaf litter at a fair discount.
3) Outbuildings: sheds, lean-tos, greenhouses etc. Absolutely not. Though I am willing to compromise on a tasteful gazebo (perhaps wrought iron), where tenants may sit in the shade to have a snack. I expect we can find a suitable space in the old stable block in which they can store any tools eg wheelbarrows they are unable to take home.
4) Scarecrows: See 3 above. Also plastic bottles, silver paper strips, dangling cds etc.
5) Attire: I suppose it would be terribly unreasonable of us to expect the tenants to wear 18th Century under-gardener's clothing! And difficult to source I imagine. However, a fleece or sweatshirt with matching trousers and wellies would be both smart and practical. I'm sure it would be possible to get the Pargetter crest embossed onto the wellies as well as embroidered on the sweatshirts. Baseball caps or panamas? I prefer a panama but of course am willing to defer to your experience in this matter.
Perhaps you can let me know your preference when we have the first planning meeting that I have pencilled into my diary for 10.45 next Wednesday. I do hope this is convenient for you.
With best wishes as always
Elizabeth
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