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A spiritual comment and prayer to start the day with Bishop John Inge

Good morning.

When my wife died five years ago it was devastating for me and my two children, then aged 9 and 13. Amidst the excruciating pain, what was almost unbearable to witness as the months went by was the way in which one of them ‘closed down’ and, however much love and affirmation given, spiralled down to despair. I was reminded the hard way that children can so easily blame themselves for the death of a loved one, even if they know at one level that it’s not at all their fault.

Jesus told us to love God and to love our neighbour as ourself. When people repeat that this summary of the law they very often leave out the third party – ourselves.

Love of self is crucial if we are to be healthy but sometimes, as for my child, it can seem impossible. So much of the almost epidemic proportions of mental health difficulties experienced by young people today is as a result of poor self-image and low self-esteem. It doesn’t need something as dramatic as the death of a loved one for that to set in. The causes are many but love is the only cure I know. Thankfully, my child is now turning the corner.

God’s love is the ultimate cure. I could never really understand being unconditionally loved until I had my own children and experienced such an enormously powerful love for them. I try to love myself because, eventually, I have come to believe that I might be lovable.

Loving and gracious God,
You have made us in your image and you love us.
Grant us the grace to love ourselves as you love us
And so find you peace.

Amen.