麻豆约拍

If you have a dilemma and it feels like it's spiralling out of control, don't despair! Two of the wisest (and wittiest) agony aunts on the planet are on hand to help. Beloved, best-selling author Marian Keyes and acclaimed comedian and writer Tara Flynn implore you to join them at their virtual kitchen table, grab a metaphorical brew and allow them to find solutions to all your problems.

On their new Radio 4 podcast, Now You're Asking, everything from family disputes to inconsiderate eaters is tackled with aplomb.

Here's just a smattering of their wise words – on problems with work, love, housing, children, and parents.

What can you do when you just happen to have "one of those faces"? This is the dilemma posed by a help-seeker whose boss demands a sunny personality in the workplace. The correspondent explained to her employer that not only were they dealing with issues at home but they also suffer from "resting bitch face" where their natural facial expression exudes disharmony.

You don't need to not look grumpy to do your job well...

Marian and Tara both sympathised with the "RBF" sufferer, as they too are blighted by the condition. But as Marian states, this perpetual enforced niceness is "capitalism gone mad". "Sincerely this scares me to death," she says. "People can do their jobs really well without being Mr. Grinner." Marian explains that she would much rather buy a carpet from a grumpy person, while Tara runs screaming from "the pleasantness police". Both agree that we should all be allowed to do our jobs well and efficiently without being forced into being a "vivacious type" concluding: "Resting bitch face forever!"

Future Faking and the Fallacy of Bad Boy Dating

One asker contacts the duo with a romantic issue. Namely, constantly dating the wrong man. These paramours tend to consist of bad boys who offer her the world and make wild romantic gestures before quickly devolving into losers who get drunk and fart (or worse) in her car.

Both Tara and Marian are reformed bad boy devotees, in love with the idea of falling in love and the accompanying pheromone boost that comes with it. But as Marian tells us: "The perfect man does not exist." Marian blames Wuthering Heights, partly, for the problem. "That wretched book has destroyed sensible women's expectations of men." "So many wet socks on so many moors," Tara sympathises. So what's the answer? They recommend the avoidance of "future faking" or "someone who promises all early on, but it's inevitable that it's not going to endure." They implore the correspondent to try not to project expectations but rather seek out someone who is genuinely kind. Rather than grand proclamations of passion, look out for, "a quiet thoughtful gesture that shows they're listening," as Marian says.

Nightmare neighbours. It's a problem that can seriously impinge on your quality of life. One troubled soul reports that their neighbour has started filling the communal garden with large, obnoxious ornaments, including pink flamingos, an Elvis shrine and a Buddha that loudly and audibly laughs when stimulated. Rather than tackle the issue they've suppressed their rage into a simmering grudge.

For once, the ladies are in slight disagreement. While Tara considers the flamingo to be the most egregious article, Marian loves the occasional pink bird: "I think it's glamorous." Though both heartily agree that: "The buddha is a nice lad."

But, as Marian states: "most of us are terrified of confrontation, apart from the people who are far too comfortable with it." But practising your confrontational approach, and adopting the right knitwear, will help. Marian suggests visiting the offending neighbours, but to make sure to, "wear a non-threatening jumper and use the word 'mate' a lot."

Tara suggests emulating her American husband who, when in the midst of confrontation, is always calm. He takes the "not angry, just disappointed" approach towards whoever he's confronting, which is not only effective but also "hot".

Bin Bags and the Relinquishing of Control

A mother writes, pleading for help with her overly messy daughter. Though they don't live together, the mum despairs at her offspring's untidiness, trying various techniques including "good cop, bad cop" and arriving at her house with bin bags to sway her daughter on to the path of neat and tidy. But nothing seems to work, so can the ladies help?

Both Marian and Tara agree that it's more important for the mum to allow her daughter to live her life, and embrace their differences, rather than cajole her into cleanliness. As Marian points out, "Once we make our happiness contingent on the actions of another person, we're doomed." She suggests a simple mantra to repeat each morning: "I detach, with love, from my daughter's appallingly messy house." As Tara reveals, she comes from a long line of tidy obsessives and lives with a husband who has been proclaimed "the king of folding", while being very messy herself. But she's managed to find a way. "There will be some kerfuffles where boundaries are crossed. There is hope for people to get along, but you do have to relinquish control."

Family disputes, and wounds that run deep, can be a particularly painful problem. A correspondent writes in and explains that their recently deceased father wrote them out of his will because they were gay. Now they want to suggest to their siblings that they're compensated in the legacy, which runs to several million pounds, but aren't sure how to approach it.

Both Tara and Marian appreciated the complexity of this problem, involving grief, abandonment and misunderstanding. But they agree that the most important thing to do is accept that the death of a parent, no matter what state the relationship was in, will leave us feeling raw and vulnerable. Self-care is vital. As Tara states: "Don't forget you're grieving right now, you have to be so gentle with yourself. All of this is going to seem totally unsolvable." They suggest speaking to a counsellor or therapist before reaching out to the siblings, while preparing for any outcome, even crushing disappointment. As Marian says: "The amount of family fallouts over money, it's rarely about money. It's about primal emotions that we can't control."

Got a problem you want Marian and Tara to solve? Email marianandtara@bbc.co.uk.