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24 September 2014
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Alan Clark's roguish recollections


Clark on his Parliamentary colleagues


He once told dinner-jacket clad Cabinet Minister Sir Geoffrey Howe: "Bring us three Bucks Fizzes and keep the change."


Turning to Prime Minister Thatcher, he commented: "The head waiter wants to know what you'd like to drink."


He described Kenneth Clarke as, "a pudgy puffball"; said that Douglas Hurd, "might as well have a corncob up his arse"; and referred to Michael Heseltine as the kind of individual, "who bought his own furniture".


Clark on Prime Minister Thatcher


He confessed he found her attractive but, "I didn't want to jump on her".


Clark on Eton


"An early introduction to human cruelty, treachery and extreme physical hardship."


Clark on being fined Β£650 after driving through a police security cordon


"Everyone in public life ought to be arrested at least once. It's an education."


Clark on style


Learning that American Mafia chief John Gotti wore $2,000 suits, Clark retorted: "I didn't know it was possible to buy one so cheaply."


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