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Posted by Swell_Map (U14129256) on Thursday, 4th March 2010
Gideon, if you had to choose between the two, would you open a heel bar or a nail bar?
It's a question I've considered many times and on balance I would always prefer the former.
I respect your choice, but I think you've been seduced by the idea of an apron and a hammer. You'll never make your millions in a heel bar.
As long as I have artistic integrity that's all that matters. Let the nail people make their millions.
I bet you wouldn't even do engraving on the side, to bolster your margins would you?
Only if there were some local tankards who would otherwise go needy.
You need to compromise your artistic ideals, chap.
It's all about maximising your sales per square foot, these days.
That's why I'm opening a haberdashery.
Haberdasheries are no longer on the High Street, they've been swallowed up by the big multiples stepping on their toes.
On the other hand, people still need heel bars even if ours does cut keys and engrave tankards (and went into one who changed watch batteries as well). Most useful.
I had a beloved pair of boots reheeled recently, it cost Β£40 but as they were irreplaceable it was well worth it.
Maybe you could open a heel and nail bar in one. You on one side banging away covered in black rubber marks, the missus on the other filing away on cuticles and talking about holidays.
Very cosy, very cost-effective.
If you were considering opening a heel bar just for people with square feet, you're probably better off opening a haberdashery. Unless you live on the Isle of Sheppey where square feet are a common genetic trait.
...one side banging away covered in black rubber marks, the missus on the other filing away on cuticles and talking about holidays.Β
Our local nail bar's run by a bloke.
, in reply to message 11.
Posted by Cyril Benson in Penrith (U2611279) on Thursday, 4th March 2010
Would you cut keys? I think these are the key to a successful heel bar nowadays. And change watch batteries, using a smaller hammer of course
I should also point out that the concept of a nail bar is far too self-limiting. If you sell screws as well you will increase your turnover. You could also increase your turnover by selling turnovers, and if your puff pastry is anything like mine you could repair the shoes with it.
I my nail/heel bar I'd have a Nespresso, Nestle's cunning new coffee capsule system. Thus making it a nail/heel/coffee bar all in one. Maybe also a passport photo machine too. My sales per square foot would be eye-watering.
Just shoes. Everyone will always need shoes. Sensible shoes mainly though I will also do a mocassin when I learn to spell it.
, in reply to message 15.
Posted by Cyril Benson in Penrith (U2611279) on Thursday, 4th March 2010
Nespresso, don't you need a heel hammer to get them open?
Shoes will be a thing of the past, once I perfect that rocket jet-pack. You'll just need thermal socks.
I'm getting concerned about your obsession with square feet. Your heel bar would have to be right in the centre of a very shallow gene pool. How about a heel bar catering for clowns? You'd feed yourself for a month on the proceeds from one job.
If you're going to specialise in clowns' shoes, you should go into partnership with a motor mechanic as their cars are always going wrong.
If we could get Nike and Adidas to put heels on their trainers then we could attract the younger market
There's only one solution.
Just listen to the words of Electric Six:
I wanna visit my local small business advisor and open a nail bar, nail bar, nail bar!
Are you sure that the Nespresso system can cope with the demands of commercial coffee making? I've been doing some research into this and I reckon you'd need a Gaggia or a Wega (others are available etc.) with a separate grinder to do a proper job of serving 200+ cups of top notch coffee per day. Do Nestle offer barrista training?
then there's that one that does a James Brown Goose Line Dance. I saw one in Tesco (osaa) yesterday and said to myself "there's drinking so much coffee you stay awake until the Underpant Gnomes come for your shreddies, and then there's drinking so much coffee that you see your espresso machine do the Goose Line Dance with all your expensive coffee sachets.
"To the tune of James Brown".
How does Gid cope?
Was it Herring who was saying "you can truthfully tell your mother that you are working in London as a barista, but just subtly alter the pronunciation."?
Shades of Herr Lehmann!
I had a feeling there was something wrong with my spelling of "barista" but I couldn't put my finger on it. Thanks Mr Tolhurst.
I'd be happy to use Gid's heel bar when he opens up for business. What about repairs to other parts of the shoe, though? Will Gid employ Craig Charles to put a new funk'n sole on?
...will Suggs be doing the segs?
I like the idea of a heel bar serving cocktails and snacks. What could be better, getting you shoes re-soled and downing a few pints and pork scratchings while you wait.
I have a rucksack that needs a new zip, can you do that for me? When can I pick it up?
Actually, I've decided to buy a new rucksack and I'm quite excited about it. I may go for one with a slightly larger capacity than the one going to landfill.
I've mended my rucksack by using the second fastener (I've always wondered why there are two on the same zip). No ennervating trip to Millets (other purveyors of such stuff are available) after all. I just know you'll all be thrilled by this update.
Relieved, rather than thrilled.
I have all sorts of zip issueswith my luggage and clothing. YKK are my bete noire.
Perhaps you should replace your luggage with some with the dual fastener function like on my ruckie.
what if Gid opened a nail bar?
Could the manicures be provided by Death Cab for Cuticle?
Tolhurst - thats a 100% groaner
And the pedicures by Pearl Toe Jam, presumably.
would the 9 Inch Nails do the biggest jobs at the studio?
I'm resisting making some crass joke about who does the biggest jobs in the studio.
Gideon, my shoes are eminently sensible according to the first definition in the OED. You can see them, you can hear them coming, you could touch them (at your own risk), You could taste them (if you wanted to re-enact a famous scene from a Chaplin movie), and you can certainly get a whiff o'them if the wind's in the right direction (that would probably be any direction, to be honest).
, in reply to message 35.
Posted by williewandsworth (U13646815) on Saturday, 6th March 2010
YKK are my bete noire.
didnt the ramones have a song about them, the YKK took my baby away............?
I'm resisting making some crass joke about who does the biggest jobs in the studio.Β
I can just "see you" in your before-they-were-fashionable-and-the-only-person-in-the-whole-of-Britain-with-one goatee beard and your banana boots going into that routine.
Yesterday's "Clash v. Crass" Punk World Cup tie on Lammo prompted me to think about servicing the MG on the one hand (BOTCH the catch tank, BOTCH the catch tank) whereas Crass are mainly notable for being the punchline to a Rob Newman "punk gig in Aylesbury" routine. So tell Rob Newman "I liked your Crass joke" and he'll say "Thank you".
It's already 25 years since I realised I was listening to Sham 69 while doing the ironing and someone I met in an insurance brokers' said he found listening to the Clash while changing a nappy quite a "Wake up! WHAT are you doing?" moment.
Talk about Gideon's show and Freak Zone on the 6 Music Message boards.
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