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Posted by tolhurst (U6377463) on Wednesday, 24th June 2009
The growing excitement about Glastonbury made me think there should be a rock festival for duffers, featuring things high in natural duffertude like this:
an area to park your concours standard Vanden Plas 1300 and eat *other factory-made Cherry Bakewells are available* off the rear-seat picnic tray while Birdsong FM blasts out from the Naturezone stage.
Comfy beds with ensuite avocado, peach or primrose bathrooms in nearby thatched guesthouses are also a must, along with Teasmades.
Any more ideas?
Sort of "Back to Gran's" rather than "Back to Mine"?
Teasmades are fabulous; indispensable if you're doing shift work.
Tartan travel rugs ought to feature somewhere as well.
And flowery cushions in beige!
How about doilies for the shop bought cakes and an arguement about whether the tea should be poured before the milk or the milk should be poured into the tea cup (never a sensible size mug) before the tea.
China of course Purrmeister
And matching saucers - but absolutely no slurping from said item! Uncouth....
The festival site should encompass a pond or a small lake in a far corner of its grounds for festival attendees to gaze wistfully upon whilst some disagreeable ruffians are making a din on the music stages.
Of course, you could argue that such an act would never be booked for Dufftonbury but it's not what you know, it's who you know and these people always worm their way into and then blemish the limelight.
Valour - its got to be a pond with some of those water lilies floating about. A lake would be far too big and unmanageable and you might get people (gasp) having a swim!.
As for stage.......don't you mean a tasteful bandstand with fancy banners hiding the wood rot?
, in reply to message 6.
Posted by Cyril Benson in Penrith (U2611279) on Thursday, 25th June 2009
such an act would never be booked for DufftonburyΒ
If Dufftonbury is as popular as I suspect it will be, the budget should stretch to any band, their agents will smell the money and sign them up before they've realised it's Not Their Kind Of Event.
I'm ready to shell out Β£119 plus booking fee, and I'm the tightest codger in all of Westmoreland.
If Dufftonbury is as popular as I suspect it will be, the budget should stretch to any band, their agents will smell the money and sign them up before they've realised it's Not Their Kind Of Event.Β
Then it'd be a one-off event, Duffers wouldn't go the following year, 'cos someone would have made a wrong decision!
It happens y'know!
I believe for this year's event the following must be engaged:
A "That nice young man selling madeira cake" stall.
A "something horrible happens to modern music when you turn 35" zone.
A man renting out deckchairs...
and flyswats - in raffia (beige)
We'd finish up early to cut down on light pollution and also to allow duffers the chance to catch the last train home.
Yes - 'cos they'll have been up since dawn rattling around waking everyone else up. It will have been along day for them.
Time for cocoa before bed.
what you don't want is to live near the Dufftonbury site.
It'll take ages to get a stamp in the local post office!
At least the excessive volume of the pianolas until as late as 11pm and the discarded doileys on the floor will give you something to complain about for months.
By the way, I don't think we're sure we're the target audience for Dufftonbury or not. If it were a venue for me, if I could bring a picnic basket filled with triangular fish paste and cucumber sandwiches I'd be happy.
As for acts, they'd have to be quiet to respect the environment (though older duffers might enjoy it louder so they needn't bring their hearing aids). Westworld were brilliant acoustically. How about Milli Vanilli without their backing band and "Kraftwerk unplugged"?
, in reply to message 12.
Posted by Cyril Benson in Penrith (U2611279) on Thursday, 25th June 2009
to allow duffers the chance to catch the last train homeΒ
Ah, there's a precedent for that, Blur did their reunion gig in the tiny East Anglian Railway Museum, finishing their set to allow fans to catch the 22:13 last train to Marks Tey.
I hope there was a stall selling Alex James' fine cheeses.
And we're off again for 2010!
I am so, so glad I don't live anywhere near Glastonbury.
Can Gid go shopping in the area and bring us a "most interesting portrait in photographer's window" award? (there's a photographer's in Wincanton with a portrait of a young lady wearing huge earrings in an apparent attempt to divert attention from her cleavage)...
6music is going "Glastonbury, Glastonbury, GLASTONBURY" again.
Fire up the Commer Walk-Thru!
It must be time for Dufftonbury.
Though couldn't we have a few more books than Glastonbury? The festival the Fonz would call "Hayyy"?
I thought that "Hayyy" was a literary festival?
Lol,
I think it must have been you who torpedoed young Ravenscroft with that joke last night. Amiright?
, in reply to message 19.
Posted by Tinsnail_Racer (U1486682) on Wednesday, 1st June 2011
Naw, it wisny me.... I was busy messing about with speaker cabinets and solder and stuff. Radio on but not really listening, so didn't hear the joke either.
I'm the piano correspondent.
no, it was me, it was me.
He had just complained about getting mail from lunatics which to me translated as "calling all tolhursts, calling all tolhursts".
So that was actually my own invention.
Could Dufftonbury have its own library?
, in reply to message 21.
Posted by Tinsnail_Racer (U1486682) on Wednesday, 1st June 2011
Where, geographically, is Dufftonbury?
To get to Dufftonbury all we have to do is to sit back in our armchairs with a nice relaxing cup of cocoa, close our eyes, and click the heels of our red slippers three times. saying "There's no place like Dufftonbury. There's no place like Dufftonbury.".
Alternatively, at the time of year when your cardigans are getting a bit warm for you, you can watch the B roads of Britain to see if you can spot a Duff-y convoy of Vanden Plas 1100s (with picnic rugs in boot) heading for the promised all-evening (until 10.30pm!) no holds barred, mindless sit-quietly-in-the-corner-up and Madeira- cake-a-thon. Then, if your Series V Singer Gazelle will start, you can join the convoy!
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