Can't take the heat? Head for the kitchen...
Looking for a job? It turns out that even in these recession-hit times, there are a couple of openings in the House of Lords. Not only are their lordships seeking a new kitchen porter, they're also planning to .
The second job looks a bit more alluring. The sleazebuster-general will be responsible for the independent investigation and assessment of allegations of breaches of the House's code of conduct by peers, including transgressions relating to expenses and allowances.
They want someone who has operated at senior level within a complex organisation in the public or private sector, who will bring "natural authority" to the role. And they must be able to withstand "intense public and media scrutiny".
Given the attention focused on various allegations of cash for amendments and expenses fiddles, not to mention the increasingly painful spotlight being focused on the tax arrangements of certain peers, their lordships are going to need someone who can take a lot of heat. And some of that heat may even emanate from the chamber itself. After all the commissioner's rulings will be laid before - a daunting array of former law lords, attorneys-general and leading counsels, not to mention some pretty formidable bruisers who carry no legal qualifications.
"Discretion in handling information of a highly sensitive nature will be critical," says the job description. "The appointee will demonstrate the highest levels of personal integrity, fairness and impartiality." That begins to look like a bit of an understatement.
The successful candidate will work a minimum of five days per month and must be available for additional work at short notice when required. Pro-rata, the pay is Β£90,000 per year - a bit less than the Β£108,000 paid to the equivalent figure over in the Commons, John Lyon, for his four day week.
I'm Mark D'Arcy and I'll be writing about what goes on in the chambers and committee rooms at Westminster.
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